A sidesplitting satire on the 2000s. A story about us Schmucks? What a great idea! Certainly more interesting than those boring memoirs of politicians. —A member of the Schmuck family Abel doesn't deserve a whole book. Who does he think he is? Take it from me, those Schmucks should be told to shut up! — Elizabeth, unfortunately married to one I wish that I had thought of writing a book like that. How much I could have satirized the world around us. —Mark Twain Burn him! Burn him! He should not be allowed to speak another word! Into the flames with him! Together with all the copies of his story! They are the enemies of my new world order! — Kim Jong-il