n our head during any birth we experience two thoughts can exist simultaneously. We can 'think' about how we feel (which can be comments like: 'IT HURTS SO MUCH" to 'It's not as bad as I thought it would be' to 'I'm lying here having these things done to me and that's weird'). At the same time our Mind can tell us what to 'do': "I'm going to soften inside my pelvis' or 'It's really important I use my breathing to relax'. How we 'feel' and what we 'do' do not have to be congruent. That's a mistake many birthing women make. They believe to have an empowered birth they must 'like' the experience. No, you can hate every moment and use skills to be a wonderful manager of the experience you are having. This is where true 'empowerment' comes from.