Caring for a Loved One with Dementia: A Conversation with Philip Burley

Life is difficult enough without having to deal with an illness that incapacitates or leads to the death of a loved one, especially when that person is our lifelong mate. …All of Annie’s wifely and motherly instincts came to her aid when the reality of her husband’s illness came rushing into her awareness, foreshadowing his early death. As a prospective survivor with perhaps many years ahead of her, she asked the understandable question, “What is going to happen to me?” "…Instead of fighting reality, I embrace it. I tell myself and people I work with, 'Whatever is bothering you and whatever you don’t want to face, turn around and walk toward it. Walk right into it, even if it’s very painful and seems impossible to do, because in doing that you’ll knock the problem down to size and put it in the right perspective.' When we do that, the situation will change. Things will get better, and the problem will either go away or at least be easier to live with. We will not have the same degree of discomfort we had before." Philip Burley