About the Book, "CALM AND STORMY" Henares once wrote: "Filipinos do not appreciate the art of giving insult, a great diversion of intellectuals. Sarcasm, Ridicule, Derision, are part of the arsenal of a combative intellect and are in the great tradition of Disraeli and Gladstone, Abraham Lincoln, Bernard Shaw, and William Shakespeare, and Winston Churchill. Indeed, 'Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.' For barbed wit and insults are good substitutes for the gun and the grenade. They are therapeutic catharsis for rage and frustration, a primal scream to purge the bile out of the system. Beware of the quiet polite ones who bottle their anger, they are the ones who shoot you at the back of your head." It is in this spirit that Henares felt compelled to publish a Glossary of nicknames he concocted for people in power, who "do not mind being feared and hated, but hate to be laughed at, to be made fun of." The reader will find it interesting, amusing, even distressing, for Henares has a way with words, for alliteration, exaggeration, puns, and allusion to the classics he read. Under PERSONALITIES, he chronicles his meeting with the man for whom Forbes Park was named and comes to the conclusion that the man is a bigot and an idiot; he cites the Marcos diaries that show a father's concerns about his son and heir, Bongbong; he writes of Enriquito Zobel and his sister-in-law Queen Bea; of Imelda Tabiano, a maid servant who migrated to the USA; of men and women politicians, of whom he exclaims "Up with the skirts and down with the pants!"; of painter Pia Rivera who wants to emulate Leonardo da Vinci; Tingting Cojuangco, of whom he writes a long article consisting of one very very long sentence, with due apologies to James Joyce; of his secretary nicknamed Galatea who declared her independence and inalienable right to get laid; of Washington Sycip and Ana Yu, the love of his life; of Toby Tamayo who makes a living promoting unnatural sex acts; of a fishwife with coarse manners; of a beauty queen, who is a communist, who advocates legalization of prostitution. Under PHILIPPINES, he cites the Best Presidents we ever had, and the Ten Most Important Filipinos of the 20th Century; and in between he waxes lyrical about our children above all; the shenanigans of our politicians and a comic strip called Pig Pen that satirizes their behavior; of Bar Examination that is the rite of passage of lawyers and politicians; of the intrusive presence of security guards; of our unsolvable traffic problem; of our newspapers (words made flesh that dwell among us) and hatched-matched-dispatched (a litany of births, marriages and deaths); cherry blossoms and treason; and Lucio Tan's Paradise Lost and Paradise Regained. Under THE HUMAN CONDITION, Henares advances the proposition that Leadership and Sex Mania spring from the same source, and cites historical evidence to prove it; then he turns about and tell us how to take care of our Asthma and Heart problems, then again how to be lucky, how to acquire useful skills like riding the bicycle and making love, what and where to eat, and how to pray the oldest extant prayer that guided men to God, 5,000 years before Christ was born; then he tells us a different Christmas story that will wrench your heart and drown you in tears; and teach you what happens above the neck and below the belt. All these in vintage Henares style. And at the end, he leaves you to the tender mercies of other authors. To Nick Joaquin who lectures you on Journalism versus Literature, and convinces you that all those characters from UP who recommend would-be National Artists for the consideration of the President of the Philippines, are WRONG to be so purist: that indeed Henares was right when he said that History is Literature, that Journalism is Literature, that Carlos Quirino and Alejandro Roces, despite having studied in La Salle and Ateneo may indeed be worthy National Artists. (Cont. insid