A Goldfish in the Ear

A Goldfish in the Ear is a fast moving, contemporary adventure set in a surreal world of big business and Surrey village life. Anchored firmly in reality it's extrapolated into the ridiculous, explored through wit and irony and held together by a rollicking good adventure. Jake our young irrepressible hero is striving to make his way in the tough business world of Acme Industries but everything and everyone conspire against him in ways that are completely beyond his ken. Little is what it seems but he continues to persevere. The story centres around an immense cloning conspiracy whilst also involving a resurrected Neanderthal who inspires a new religion and several fashion trends; a computer that actively conspires against humans; a construction company that completes projects in days not months; Jake's dysfunctional family including a twin sister who is much more than just his sister; hungry Aliens revisiting earth; a boss that makes Attila the Hun look soft and other bizarre and extreme characters - some of whom are relevant to the plot. And then there's the cloned butlers; identical elderly butlers who are much in demand by high society. Unfortunately they all have the same effective working life of just two years from inception before senility sets in, necessitating their replacement. The first sign of senility is a tendency to put goldfish in each ear. The innumerable interlinked plot lines come together in a series of theatrical denouements as each of the arch villains explain all, only to be out manoeuvred by someone even higher up the food chain.